"She's four months and it's been hard because I'm in recovery, too. So, it's like, I came from a tent from the side of the street. Now, I have an apartment, a car, and I have my kid. I'm getting ready to go put her in daycare, so I can go back to work. I'm getting there. It's just taking time, it's been difficult; it really has, it's been hard. The streets ain't nothing to play with. People are dying everyday and we done lost everybody we know and loved. I gotta kid to look after, now.
All you can do is thank God for everyday that you're given. I pray all day and everyday. I still get stuck sometimes and want to go back to the streets but then I get to thinking about how these people, out here, don't love me. They don't care if I got my kid or not. They don't care who has her. They don't care if I'm alive. It's crazy out here, I hate it. That's why when I'm walking down the street, I keep my headphones in. I know everybody, so I try to keep my distance from the people I used to associate with. So, I be trying to get other people that I know into recovery but they don't want anything to do with it. It's a struggle.
I learned a lot of shit from being in recovery. My biggest thing is knowing that I ain't gotta live like that anymore. I give it all to God, now. He's got me, he's with me and he's gonna take care of me. If I just stay on the right road and take care of this little girl, I'll be straight. I ain't gotta sleep in a tent anymore. I don't have to starve. I was eight months pregnant, living in a tent. That's embarrassing! I was walking around here, pregnant, and people were looking at me like, 'What are you doing on the street?' and knowing that I was a drug addict. It makes me feel good to know that people don't have to look at me like that. Now, they're looking at me and knowing that I'm out here doing what I have to do for my baby and for myself, so I can live a real life. I'm not sleeping on the fucking concrete and begging people for cigarettes and change. It's crazy to see how much my life has changed since I gave all of that away. I don't have to carry all that pain and trauma anymore. I don't have to die, today.
Keep it real simple. Do what you gotta do and keep it simple. Stop trying to complicate shit and take yourself out of it. Stop running off of emotion and do what's right." - Kayla, California